Friday, May 28, 2004

7:44 PM - a quick update

barely worthy of a snappy title

Just a quick not-quite-24-hour update: I have written a letter to my non-responsive landlord and am CC'ing it to the Berkeley Rent Board and a Berkeley Dispute Mediation group. Looking through my letters to him from last year, this isn't the first time I've felt physically intimidated by these neighbors, and I refuse to a) live in fear or b) move out because my landlord picked assy tenants and doesn't want to deal with the consequences. So if my landlord still refuses to take action, the other groups can get involved.

My shoulder feels mostly better. I'm taking it to the gym in a moment, where we will be gentle, but I don't think inactivity will make it stronger. Plus I could use a good run if I'm going to be a sexy unicorn as opposed to a jellopuff unicorn. *shudder* And I'm taking it slow this week... and probably next too.

I've gotten a lot of support and kind words from some of the wonderful people who I tend to forget are around at times like these.... so thank you all! I hope everyone enjoys their weekends... I'll be working for part of mine, so go out and have fun for me!

Thursday, May 27, 2004

11:13 PM - tiger balm, tow trucks and ribbons.... oh my!

people are dumb and I hate them all

I discovered one of the reasons that I am not a fast costumer-- I like to play dress up. It's astounding to me how many times during the course of making one part of one outfit that I will throw it on and prance around like Homestar Runner. Tonight I attached the ribbons to the mask I decorated for the unicorn costume... and pretty soon it was unicorn mask with Kuja hair, unicorn mask with top hat, do my little turn on the catwalk, la la la. I have decided that the mask looks much prettier on a foam head than it does on me, but at least I learned that before the party in June I will have to a) cut my hair shorter, b) shave, and c) replace my own head with a foam one.

In the plus column, I just learned that the Forgotten Opera will have a gigantic haunted hedge maze.

Had a run-in with one of the white trash thugs who's decided to try to claim the illegal parking spot. Again. Tell me... who leaves their car parked underneath a "No Parking, Tow Away Zone" sign unattended for two hours, with the keys on the dash, the door open, the passenger seat on the ground outside the car, with various tools and a BB gun strewn on the ground and in the backseat? Is it unreasonable of me to have a problem with that?

Part of why I'm so cranky is that today, after 4 weeks of relatively gentle aerial class, my shoulder has decided to hurt, which means I probably did something bad to it. The good news is that at least it means that all of the pain I have had since the surgery has been scar tissue pain, which is good because I am stretching things. The bad news is that rotator cuff pain like I felt all day today is -not- something that I am willing to live with and/or live in fear of for the rest of my life. I'm going to rest it for a while, and see if I can figure out how I can protect it more or avoid certain positions. Maybe I got a little over-enthusiastic in class yesterday, but then again it has been almost 2 years.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

12:43 AM - I don't have any anime convention bandwagons to hop on, so you'll just have to read this, instead

sancing with myself, oh oh oh

Hi there. It's been a while since I last updated. I've been emotional, there's a lot going on right now, and it's tough for me because I don't really want to discuss it. I guess for the most part, I am just feeling raw, like the last layer of tender skin that is still wrinkly and thin that is left when a blister is gone. I want my life to change, and every time I've gone down this road, I've gotten too terrified and slunk back into a comfortable life that I hate. So... I don't want to do that any more.

I took my car in today to be examined and serviced, and I ended up with a $900 bill. Not a $900 bill that I could exchange, for example, for 9 $100 notes of legal tender, but rather $900 of debt. My car was falling apart a little, and I'm glad that things are fixed, but I have to wonder, is this because Saturns are poorly constructed? Is my beautiful (slightly scratched) purple thunderbolt of freedom a rolling deathtrap? I certainly hope not. The current plan is to keep it alive and healthy until an alternative energy vehicle is a reasonable possibility... which means next month we are going back to the mechanic to fix that gasket that keeps leaking coolant all over the fucking place. My poor car. Maybe by the time I buy a hydrogen fuel cell vehicle, I'll have paid off my credit card debt. How are normal (non-bionic) humans supposed to buy houses in California?

On another note, I am starting a new project. It is in its infant stages, and some of you will probably start having deja vu from "Tony thinks larger than life" about two years ago. Anyway, I've always wanted to direct my own theatrical multi-disciplinary (but circus-heavy) show. And about two years ago I wrote something, drew costume sketches, created characters, shanghai'd friends on good faith... and eventually I was drowned in depressing waves of self-doubt which were reinforced when I didn't get the one grant that I applied for. Well, two. I convinced myself that I didn't draw well enough, write well enough, or even have good enough ideas to do something that I really wanted to do, which was somehow easier to swallow than the fear of actually pursuing it. So anyway, I am ready to try this again, a little bit wiser and more self-aware. I've been fishing around for a show concept to match my title, and tonight I realized that I have about 3 years of my own written source material, on topic, even!, that I can incorporate into this project. And it took wandering into the Berkeley Hills at night and weeping to realize that, so yeah, sometimes I can be oblivious to the obvious.

The important thing is this: I'm starting to look for performers. My strategy at the moment is just to explore: maybe I can get some info about people who are out there and who might be looking for opportunities to perform, and then I can see what people do and who is out there and let those resources roll around in my brain at the same time as I am congealing that script thing. At the moment I am more interested in expanding my perception of what's possible and what people can do rather than narrowing the field of who specifically fits into an already-scripted place. I know I am being vague right now, and tough cookies: I hadn't even meant to write this much in my blog... what was my point again? Oh yeah. Call for performers. E-mail me or drop a note in this journal.

It's 1:15 am and I am at work. I will be here until maybe 4 or 5 am. It might be fun, while I am here, to re-arrange the nametags on everyone's doors. Except that everyone has different sizes/styles of nametags. Curses, foiled again.

Oh yeah, my film theory class is finally completely done. The teacher asked for a copy of Gracie Allen on a Pencil, after embarrassing me by showing it all to the entire class right as we started the final. I'm glad -someone- liked it, after all you sillies forgot to write in my journal to tell me how much you love me. Um.... her. Yeah. heh. Hope you are all sleeping tight...

Monday, May 17, 2004

12:36 AM - laugh at the pencil. and oh yeah, there are pictures here too

the pencil is funny

Hey everyone, I finally received and posted pictures from the spy party. Here is the link! Go take a look. And if you need me to update anything, or if I forgot your spy name, please e-mail me.

The rest of the weekend was just lovely. I've been working hard, although you'd never guess. As a side note, I will most likely be attending Ggreg Taylor's Forgotten Opera II which was absolutely rad last year. So go take a look at the link! It's kinda expensive, but I had a ton of fun. And this year, I hope to go in my eagerly awaited Unicorn costume.

*sew, sew, sew*

In conclusion, the pencil image down there is funny. Laugh!

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

3:06 AM - Gracie Allen makes a guest appearance

why I shouldn't do my homework late at night

Today I get to hand in the last assignment -ever- for my Film Theory class. Hooray! To celebrate, I thought I would share with you the last sentence of my last assignment. It says:

For example,

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

11:06 PM - and you thought it was only good for watching your neighbors through an open window

twinkle

I just want to thank P. Ping Thomas of the spy party for leaving me all of that kiddie spy equipment. I tried using the binoculars for stargazing tonight and I saw a comet!! I'm going outside to look some more. Woohoo!

Monday, May 10, 2004

1:01 PM - what I've been up to, even though Blogger ate my first draft

back from the dead

I just wrote this whole long summary of the past couple weeks and I clicked the wrong button and now it's all gone. Thanks, Blogger, for changing your functionality on me. Jerks.

Anyway, the basic gist, list style:

-I had a party and still need to get pictures from people. The party was great, the people were really fun, send me your pictures and I'll make a web page out of them.

-I had my first class with Terry Sendgraff and she is awesome. I am looking forward to this week again.

-I am exploring Flash animations again, and hopefully I might have a mini Flash blog entry soon. Thrills and chills.

-I am still knitting my Hufflepuff scarf, but not so fervently because I'll probably be out of town for the movie premiere anyway.